First, I'd like to thank you for all you do. I know you work hard. I also feel certain that when you decided to become a High School band director, you knew what you were getting into.
Having said that, I'm kinda pissed off at a couple things my son has share with us. First, the notion that you are directing an "elite" band and therefore can turn away potentially talented musicians speaks more to your inability to foster a love of music than a student's lack of ability.
Second, during marching season (pretty much from April to October for drumline parents) our world revolves around getting to and from private lessons, drumline camp, band camp and competitions. Forgive us if, once concert band season rolls around, our enthusiasm for concerts every 6 weeks wanes. Don't tell your musicians that you're disappointed that more parents don't come to concerts.
Third, while I chose to give more of my time than money, I have given both generously (I think). I wrote my son's band fee for almost twice the amount we had to because I knew I wouldn't be able to volunteer as much as others. Additionally, I gave cash to the band camp snack/water lady instead of buying the wrong kind of energy drink (as I did last year only to be told they didn't want what I had purchased). My $50 was never acknowledged.
When I show up at a competition, I always find the band and help shine shoes, check pant hems, and otherwise help out where it's needed...and I've never gotten a thank-you or even an acknowledgement.
So, screw you. You aren't going to build a band program without the help of parents. Your band boosters should have someone designated as a greeting for parents who show up on the fly to help. Instead your boosters act like a big elite clique and do nothing to invite others into their inner circle.