1. Your child does NOT have a panic disorder. He does NOT hyperventilate and have a tummy ache because of the stress of school. He's almost 18 and freely admits that he's been 'cheating' since Jr. High and doesn't "do" school work. A real panic attack won't result in punching a cinder block wall. I'm going to go out on a limb and say that he was "that kid" who threw a temper tantrum in the check out aisle when you said "No" to the pack of gum he wanted....and then you broke down and BOUGHT THE GUM when he started banging his head on the ground. Thanks for that.
2. When your kid doesn't show up for school for a couple days and I call you to report the absence I will leave a message. It's a bad idea to look at your cell phone and dial back the unfamiliar number...I have caller i.d. It's also a bad idea for your kid to tell me that you lost your phone over the weekend...because you just called me back...on your lost cell phone.
3. It's a bad idea to post a picture of yourself chugging from a handle of Captain at about 9 PM and then have your dad call you in late saying you're having trouble waking up this moring...and oh, by they way, you have court today. Then show up at school "after court" and ask me if I have any Tylenol.
4. Yes, I can see that you are very mature for your age and can't be bothered with the drama at your high school. I also think the story of how your boyfriend proposed is very, very sweet. I'm not real sympathetic when your mom calls and says your going to be late to school (for the 325th time) because your sad and have stomach troubles. Your tummy seemed fine 3rd hour when you were laying atop a classmate...and 5th hour when you were nose to nose with another classmate....and 6th hour when.....nevermind....
5. Mom? Dad? I know you love your children and only want the best for them. It is hard for a lot of us parents to keep up with current trends. Often our kids seem so far ahead of the curve when it come to current culture. But, really, your kids are NOT your friends. They are NOT your equals. They are children. And often, when they act out, they are really BEGGING for boundaries.