Student: When I grow up I wanna have a pet monkey.
Me: My mom's uncle had a pet monkey he kept in the garage. I think it was kinda mean.
Student: Really? He kept it in the garage?
Me: Yeah, but I never got to see it.
Student: Well, I won't keep my pet monkey in the garage.
Me: Monkey's don't always make very good pets.
Student: Oh, mine will. I'm going to teach it how to roll joints for me.
Me: ....
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